Mie and Who?? (Mie N Yu)

Last Sunday was my mom's birthday. For her birthday dinner my sister made reservations to Mie N Yu located in Georgetown. I've actually been there before, 4 previous time to be exact, and each experience was disappointing. What confuses me though is that women LOVE Mie N Yu. I don't know if it's the Arabian Nights theme of the restaurant that makes them feel like Princess Jasmine or the award winning (but dirty) restrooms, women LOVE this place!!!

If you want to get laid by your date guys then definitely bring her here. The wow factor that you'll get from your lady friend will guarantee that you will get some action after dinner but be prepared to pay for it.

I didn't take any pictures of the food because it was so bad I was worried it would spread to my camera. Kind of like shaking a fugly person's hand, the fugly might spread to you (a quote one of my friends use to say all the time). To make things simple below is a list of what we ordered:

• Pu Pu Grille
• Thai Greens Salad
• Szechuan Peppercorn Scallops
• Roasted Wild Salmon
• Vietnamese Duck Breast
• Char Masala Lamb Kabobs
• Hummus
• Toasted Flat Bread
• Chicken with Rice - This item isn't on the online menu. I don't remember the name
• Buddha Chocolate Cake
  

The online menu can be found here which provides a thorough description of what's in each dish.

The Pu Pu grille was their taste platter appetizer. It contained pretty much all the appetizers they had on the menu. Nothing on the Pu Pu Grille made me go "Wow". The tempura vegetables were not crispy and a bit too oily, the panko shrimp was a bit too oily and also not crispy, the chicken skewers were dry, and the spare ribs were average. The highlight of the Pu Pu Grille were the lamb sausages. I'd say most people would NOT like the lamb sausages. The consistency and texture of the sausage reminded me of a blood sausage. It has an over powering lamb flavor that I'm pretty sure most people would not like but I actually like that flavor.

The lamb kabobs were your run of the mill kabobs. They were made of ground lamb and served with a cilantro yogurt sauce.

The Thai Greens Salad really confused me. The description says "mixed asian greens", which to me would be something like lettuce, mint, parsley, bok choy (chinese cabbage). The majority of my greens was ARUGULA . Last time I checked arugula was not an Asian green. Other than that the salad wasn't bad but it's not that hard to make a salad. As long as your ingredients are fresh, you have a nice proportion of varying fruits and vegetables, and a decent dressing you're good.

My mom had ordered this dish the Szechuan Peppercorn Scallops which were cooked and cleaned well. The scallops were fresh and didn't have that ocean/sea water taste to them. Interestingly enough the dish is served with black sticky rice which I love. Too bad the rice was kicked so improperly that it was barely edible. Black sticky rice is a very difficult to cook especially for people who are use to Minute Rice. Because of the thicker and tougher skin, black sticky rice needs to be soaked in water for hours before cooking it.

My sister ordered the Roasted Wild Salmon. The portion was actually very generous and presentation was decent. The fish though was VERY bland and a bit over cooked. Imagine taking a salmon steak and deep frying it with no seasoning whatsoever and on top of that it's DRY.

I had ordered a chicken and jasmine rice dish. The jasmine rice was overcooked and incredibly dry. My chicken was also incredibly overcooked and dry. It was just bad.

My dad ordered Vietnamese Duck Breast cooked medium rare. By the time it came around to trying a bite of my dad's dish I was done. I had tasted too much bad food to venture any further. From what my dad said it was "average".

My sister was raving about the Buddha Chocolate Cake was we ended getting a slice ($15) to share between everyone. The cake was extremely rich and it seemed like they used quality chocolate but the batter mix was just off. I enjoy my chocolate cakes to be silky smooth or velvety. This cake was like eating peanut butter. The cake was chalky and gooey and seemed that the batter and chocolate wasn't not incorporated together very well. I really do have an affinity to chocolate cakes but I'm not really a sweets person so take my criticism of Mie N Yu's cake with a grain of salt. I mean maybe it was suppose to taste the way it did and it's the preferred method of preparation.

Whenever I took a date here it usually cost about $90 for two. This is a place you should skip unless you're bringing a date. It seems that Mie N Yu is aware that it's a great date place as it says so on its website.

Rundown:

Price: Overpriced

Service: Bad

Food: Bad

Restaurant Decor/Setting: Casual/Business Casual

3125 M Street, Northwest
Washington D.C., DC 20007
(202) 333-6122

http://www.mienyu.com

Choupi - Crepes To Go

When I use to work in Rockville I would always drive by a little yellow cart on the corner of 9th and Lynn in Rosslyn. The aroma from the cart was always inviting but I was never able to satisfy my curiosity until recently.

I've always had an affinity to crepes ever since I was a child. I prefer them over pancakes and waffles, especially non-dessert crepes. Choupi offers a comprehensive choice of toppings for both dessert and savory lovers. The list of toppings can be found here. They also offer a list of Choupi's Favorites which are suggested toppings that go well together.

I decided to head to Choupi during lunch one day and was a bit dismayed to see that there was no line. All other carts in the Rosslyn area had a pretty significant line during the lunch time rush. I was a bit hesitant seeing the lack of interest by others but decided to give it a shot anyway. I ordered a crepe with ham, mozzarella, and mushrooms. The owner was very nice and promptly started on my order. Crepes start at $3 each with each topping costing an additional 50 cents. As I waited for my crepe I noticed that the ingredients inside the cart looked pretty fresh and everything was kept organized, labeled, and clean. I've been to a few questionable carts before.

A short line (3-4) people started forming as my crepe was being made. Choupi has the ability to make two crepes (2 hot plates) at a time but they definitely take their time making crepes as a few people left before having their order taken. I would say that my crepe took about 5 minutes to make which is a pretty long time for a food cart.

The crepe is folded into a triangle shape and wrapped in wax paper. There was a generous portion of toppings and everything looked to be cooked well (not over or under done). On my first bite I noticed that how balanced the crepe batter was. It was light (not too greasy), a little sweet, and had a nice crispness to it. The batter was not too doughy and had a good butter flavor. The toppings inside tasted fresh and were cooked well.

For $4.50 I wasn't full but not hungry either. It's great value if you want something quick, easy, and tasty. If you're in the Rosslyn area I would definitely say give Choupi a try and look for the yellow cart on the corner of 9th and Lynn.

Rundown:

Price: Cheap

Service: Good

Food: Good

Restaurant Décor/Setting: Street Food

http://www.choupi.com

http://twitter.com/CHOUPICREPES

Rebel Heroes Not So Rebel

I’ve introduced a ton of my friends to various bahn mi delis in the Falls Church area (the Mecca of Vietnamese food). For the majority of the people who I have brought there, drunk or sober, they have thoroughly enjoyed the many different Vietnamese sandwiches Falls Church has to offer. A little background information before I go into my review.

Vietnam was ruled and heavily influenced by China for hundreds of years. Both countries share similar customs, holidays, traditions, and most importantly in the context of this article food. After Vietnam defeated China and gained independence they were conquered by the French, eight hundred years later, for about a hundred years. The hundred year rule by France brought a lot of bad things but the best result of it in my opinion is the fusion of French and Vietnamese cooking. Honestly you could say that Vietnam was the first Asian country to implement Fusion cooking on a national scale.

Out of this fusion of food emerged the Bahn Mi sandwich. There are a lot of different types and variations of the Bahn Mi but the most commonly eaten Bahn Mi sandwich consist of the following:

• Fresh Vietnamese French Bread (Light, airy, crunchy, fresh)
• Asian Mayonnaise (Does not taste like Hellmans or Kraft mayo)
• Heads Cheese (google this is you do not know what it is)
• Pate
• Ham
• Fresh Pickled Carrots and Daikon
• Fresh Cucumber
• Fresh Cilantro
• Fresh Chili Peppers

I hope you’ve noticed how many times I’ve emphasized fresh in my list. Vietnamese food uses a lot of raw vegetables; raw vegetables tastes best when FRESH.

Rebel Heroes is a food truck that serves variations of the Bahn Mi sandwich. When I found out about them I was both excited and a bit disappointed as I have had the idea of doing the same thing in the Arlington area. I finally found time on a weekday (they’re close on the weekends) to try out Rebel Heroes a few weeks ago. As I was walking up to Rebel Heroes with Jason I see my friend Johnny (yes, Johnny is Vietnamese and he knows what good Vietnamese food is) with his girlfriend eating Bahn Mi sandwiches. He immediately tells me that it’s not worth trying but I’ve already made the trek so there’s not point in not trying the food. After perusing the menu I end up ordering the Roast Pork Banh Mi sandwich ($5.50) while Jason orders Che-Che-Chicken with mild lime mayo ($6.00). Needless to say the experience was underwhelming.

There was so much wrong with the sandwich I don’t even know where to begin. The bread was stale and chewy, the meat was dry and bland, the mayonnaise tasted like Hellmans, the carrots and daikon were not fully pickled, and the vegetables were not fresh. Jason’s sandwich had the same problems. The owner, a mid 30s Vietnamese woman, was nice and service was amicable but good lord the food is bad and pricey. A Bahn Mi sandwich is only $3.00 - $3.50 in Falls Church. If that’s an unfair comparison since Arlington is a higher priced area then take a look at all the other sandwich/hoagie shops in the area: Panera, Teeters, Subway, Whole Foods, etc. Those places also offer free water and a nice climate controlled seating area. What irked me the most and caused me to write this review were the favorable reviews that other professional reviewers were giving Rebel Heroes.

I understand and know that objectively reviewing food is incredibly difficult especially with ethnic foods you have never tried. I am far from being a food expert but I have eaten at more establishments than I can remember and grew up in a food oriented family. The Washington Post’s Catherine Barker writes, “The meat in her signature Roast Pork Banh Mi ($5) is thinly sliced and moist, nestled in an airy baguette with bright cilantro, jalapeño slices, pickled carrots and daikon radish.” (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/01/AR2010060100786.html I know I am citing my references incorrectly but I’m too lazy to break out the MLA handbook.) Last time I checked bread is pretty much a universal food. If you can’t tell the difference between good and bad bread then you shouldn’t be reviewing anything. In the Washington City Paper.com Time Carman writes, “hate to put so much pressure on such a young business, but I think Rebel Heroes may already be the best food truck going.” (http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/youngandhungry/2010/05/05/rebel-heroes-may-already-be-the-best-food-truck-on-the-streets/) He also writes, “These are lusty and multi-layered sandwiches that lean on tradition without being beholden to them.” MULTI-LAYERED??!!?! How can a sandwich with barely any ingredients that are bland and not fresh be multi-layered?

Nothing angers me more than when I read idiotic reviews from people who try to foray into foods foreign to them and base how a dish should be by that ONE experience. Professional food reviewers know the food they are eating very well and it is not uncommon for a reviewer to visit an establishment multiple times to check for consistency.

There really is nothing rebel about Rebel Heroes.

Rundown:

Price: High

Service: Good

Food: Bad

Restaurant Décor/Setting: Street Food

http://www.rebelheroes.com/

Asian Spice

Happy New YEAR EVERYONE! One of my New Years Resolution will be to get back on the ball of updating this site.

Asian Spice opened about a year ago right in the heart of Chinatown on H St NW between 7th St & 8th St. I've heard a lot about the restaurant from friends but never got a chance to try them out since most of the comments about the restaurant was that it was overpriced.

So, on New Years Eve I decided to take my parents to lunch and my sister suggested Asian Spice. I was a bit hesitant at first but the decor looked pretty interesting (Cafe Asia like) and the employees were friendly.
Usually I like to get a good sample of the menu by ordering a few appetizers, entrees, and desserts but since this was a late lunch and had to meet friends for NYE plans we only had entrees.

We at family style and shared all the entrees. It was a bit unfortunate that two of the dishes ordered were the same since I like to try as many different flavors as possible. To the left is a Teryaki Bento Box. Everything in the Bento Box was pretty standard. The one thing worth noting was the Teryaki chicken. The Teryaki sauce was not too sweet (a common problem at many places) and the thinly sliced chicken breast was moist, tender, and not over cooked. This is definitely a great item if you need to have a quick lunch with all your food groups.

The second dish is a Malaysian Curry Noodle. None of use were very impressed with this dish. It had large chunks of chicken breast that were over cooked and extremely dry. It also had an assortment of vegetables such as potatoes, fried shallots, onions, mushrooms, and green onions. The curry was a cross between a Panang and Red Thai curry. It was overly sweet and you could really taste the coconut. In the menu description the noodles are described as rice noodles but from what I could tell they were Udon noodles. When eaten with rice it wasn't as sweet but you definitely had to be very conservative with the curry sauce.

Per my sister's recommendation the Thai Spicy Seafood Fried Rice is so good that we had to have two orders worth. She was right, this dish was indeed very good but not the best Thai fried rice I've had. This dish had a great smokey flavor in the rice as if it had been cooked on a wood grill. The shrimp, scallops, and calamari were fresh and decently sized. The only criticism I do have of the dish is that I wish the basil were chopped and sprinkled on the dish or at least removed from the stem. The fried rice tastes a lot better with the fresh basil but is a bit of a hassle since you have to remove them from the stem yourself and spread them on the rice.

The decor of Asian Spice is a contemporary Asian style that reminds me of Cafe Asia in Arlington. The lighting creates a great date like ambiance and the tables are sectioned off in small groups to offer some privacy. I'm pretty sure that the service I received is not common as the waitress we had reminded me of how servers are in high-end restaurants in Asia (at least that's what my parents said). We had a lovely waitress that would stand right behind us and rush to us whenever she saw that our water cups were half empty or if we needed sauces or napkins. It was nice having someone magically appear nowhere with what you need without having to ask but I don't think it's typical of this type of restaurant (she was probably new).

Asian Spice is a bit pricey. Lunch for four with only entrees and two drinks (hot tea) came up to be almost $85. It's a nice restaurant and the service and food was good but I wouldn't recommend Asian Spice if you are looking for authentic Asian cuisine. The location is great as you're in the heart of Chinatown and right off the Gallery Place metro station. I could see a nice dinner for two being around $100 including appetizers, dessert, and drinks. I think this place would make a great happy hour or b-day gathering though.

Rundown:

Price: Moderate
Service: Great
Food: Good
Restaurant Decor/Setting: Casual/Business Casual

717 H Street, NW
Washington, DC 20001
(202) 589-0900

http://www.asianspice.us

The Carlyle Grand

The Carlyle Grand has been one of my favorite restaurants for a long time. The excellent service, great food, and fun atmosphere never fails to deliver a wonderful lunch or dinner. I've had a majority of the menu but for this review will focus on what was ordered during my last foray at the Carlyle.

To start things we had the blue crab fritters. These are served roasted red peppers and a grilled corn salsa. The fritters are light and never too oily even though they have been deep fried and every bite contains ample amounts of crab. The sweet corn salsa paired with the roasted red peppers are a great contrast to the saltiness of the fritters and bring out great flavors. If crab isn't your thing every other appetizer on the menu is just as good.

The picture is a bit blurry but they are of Mongolian Lamb Chops. The lamb chops are served with couscous and dressed arugula. The couscous and arugula were good but nothing spectacular and a bit bland. The lamb though was excellent. Thick cut (double rib cut) and perfectly grilled medium rare the lamb chops had a smoky char grilled aroma and melted in your mouth with every bite.

The Hickory Smoked & Grilled Black Angus Rib Eye Steak was served with roasted mushrooms and cauliflower mash. Like the lamb chops the rib eye was perfectly grilled medium rare. The rib eye was tender with every bite filled with hickory. The mushrooms were roasted in a brown sauce that was a bit salty. The highlight of the meal was the cauliflower mash. The cauliflower mash was creamy and very buttery but not overpowering.

The Carlyle has great service and best of all during the warmer months they allows pets! You do have to sit outside but the servers do the best they can to accommodate people with pets with treats and water bowls. The decor of the restaurant is 1930s themed and consists of two levels. I suggest getting a table upstairs as the view over Shirlington is great especially during the holidays when they have Christmas decorations up. The service, food, and atmosphere you get for the price you pay is almost unbeatable. A great place to dine!

Rundown:

Price: Moderate

Service: Great

Food: Great

Restaurant Decor/Setting: Casual

4000 Campbell Ave
Arlington, VA 22206-3424
(703) 931-0777

http://www.greatamericanrestaurants.com/carlyle/

Urban Burger Rockville's Hidden Gem

Anddddddd.......he's back! I took a little hiatus bust made sure to take lots of photos and notes of the places I've eaten. I've continued my search for the best burger in the DC Metropolitan area and was introduced to a great local place called Urban Burger. Urban Burger won't be found easily. It's nestled in a small strip mall in the middle of a suburban community in Rockville, MD. There isn't much to do around Urban Burger but if you love great burgers it just might be worth the drive.
To start things off you choose a burger type (Black Angus, Chicken, Smoke Sausage, or Veggie) and then add a style to it (Urban BBQ, Savannah, Frank's Favorite, Blazin' Saddle, So-Cal, USA, Bleu Bayou, or Special Style). I've been to Urban Burger 3-4 times and have stuck with the Black Angus Burger cause it never fails to disappoint and I haven't tried it with ever style available.

The 6 oz patty is lightly seasoned and grilled to your liking which is rare nowadays with the fear of food poisoning. I've always been hesitant to eat ground meats not fully cooked but I can say that every medium cooked burger I have had at Urban Burger has never caused me to be ill afterward. The patty is always juicy and the quality of the beef is outstanding.

The styles which I've paired my burger with are Urban BBQ (BBQ sauce, cheddar cheese, and a thick slab of bacon), Savannah (honey mustard BBQ sauce, provolone, and a thick slab of bacon), and SO-Cal, USA (honey lime sauce, sliced avocado, and melted provolone). The BBQ sauce used in the Urban BBQ and Savannah style are of the same base and are great condiments to the burger. The BBQ sauce has a great smokey flavor and do not over power the patty which I've found happen with BBQ sauces which are too bold. The highlight of both the Urban BBQ and Savannah styles is the use of a thick slab cut of bacon. The bacon used is from Virginia and cooked just right where it's not too crispy or too soggy. The saltiness of the bacon helps bring out the sweetness of the BBQ sauce but at the same time does no over power all the other flavors.

Other than the quality and taste of the patty, what impressed me the most was the bread used. Unlike Good Stuff Eatery the buns at Urban Burger hold up when eating and don't become soggy. They're lightly toasted and taste as if they were baked in house.




What's a good burger without good sides right? The battered onions rings are thick cut and fried to perfection. For a deep fried food they're light and crisp and old oil is never used. The servings are generous and the onion rings come with a side of horseradish remoulade that offer a bit of a kick.

A burger and onions rings will run you about $10 which is a great deal considering the serving size and consistent quality. Urban Burger is a bit of a drive since it's located in a suburban community but worth the drive if you're craving a good burger.









Rundown:

Price: Low

Service: N/A

Food: Great

Restaurant Decor/Setting: Casual

5566 Norbeck Rd.
Rockville, MD 20853
301-460-0050

http://www.urbanburgerco.com/index.html

The Guest Column

A friend of mine volunteered to write a guest column for Cheap Ass Dates and what he's written is pretty hilarious. I think you guys will enjoy this one or be disturbed by it. One or the other it's all in good humor.

So this is it folks, the first guest column to appear on Cheap Ass Dates. I know what some of you may be thinking, who is this guy and what qualifies him to write a column over me? These are both very good questions, so allow me to briefly explain my credentials. I think this picture sums it up pretty well:

That’s me making inappropriate poses behind an unsuspecting life guard. Not enough for you? How’s about this?

Its okay my friends, you may stop dropping your jaw and close your mouth at this time. I know that by now surely your doubts on my understanding of dating world have been quelled. Now let’s talk about the big bad wonderful world o dating!

The first thing I’d like to talk about is George Sodini.

For those of you who do not know, George Sodini is the Pittsburgh Gym Shooter. He left a blog behind detailing his plans long before he ever carried them out. For information you can read up here http://wdbo.com/localnews/2009/08/just-discovered-pennsylvania-g.html. Sodini seems to imply the motivation and reasoning behind his actions was due to the fact that he couldn’t get a date.

Fact the First: Every person on this planet is capable of attracting date.

Now before I go breaking down what I think of the Sodini case let me just put in a disclaimer. Having read the blog and watched his videos, I believe the man is a psycho, if he were to have dated a woman and she had tried to break it off with him I believe he would have done extensive physical harm to her and probably killed her. That being said I also believe that the reason he couldn’t get a date is because he set his standards too high and it affected his level of confidence in himself.

Sodini had apparently attended a seminar on meeting and seducing younger women. This tells me that his problem was not meeting women; his problem was he wanted to meet a certain type of woman. This reminds me of an old saying “Go Ugly Early.”

Fact the Second: There is an ugly person out there for everyone.

I’ll take a second to let that soak in. Talking to the opposite sex can be an obstacle for some, especially males who feel pressured by peers or family to find an attractive partner. I’m by no means saying settle, but it doesn’t hurt to practice. Let’s run a scenario, shall we?

Before we begin I must put in another disclaimer. While I may advocate using less attractive people as practice I do not condone being insensitivity to their needs or purposely mistreating them as human beings. Now back to our scenario…

If you’re half the catch you think you are it should be no problem for you to pick up an ugly person. And let’s say you mess up in your approach or open, the ugly person should still be interested in you because odds are most people don’t approach them and try to get to know them. This is perfect practice for when it comes time to try pick up someone you may actually be physically attracted to.

Some of you may not be convinced, so let’s look at another example…this time from Hollywood. The movie, A Beautiful Mind, with Russell Crow. In the scene with the blonde in the bar the character John Nash states “If we all go for the blonde and block each other, not a single one of us is going to get her. So then we go for her friends, but they will all give us the cold shoulder because no one likes to be second choice. But what if none of us goes for the blonde? We won't get in each other's way and we won't insult the other girls. It's the only way to win. It's the only way we all get laid.” By going for the blonde’s less attractive friends Nash and buddies have guaranteed themselves a good night. This scenario works for ladies too, except that it won’t matter if you go for the good looking guy first since his friends are happy to take second choice because you have boobs. But seriously fellas, we can’t all have Megan Fox. And, speaking Megan Fox…

Fact the Third: Megan Fox is attractive and most guys want to do nasty things to her.

Guys, I don’t care who you are you’re better off hoping that she makes a sex tape with Scarlett Johansson than you are trying to date her. This is a woman who has been quoted as saying “My only job is to wake up, take a shower, and look attractive.” You don’t want that. Plus she’s been with Brian Austin Green, do you really want David Silver’s sloppy seconds? Need more proof that Megan Fox isn’t for you? Let’s watch this Jimmy Kimmel interview with Seth Rogen:

Here’s a little scenario that was once told to me by a Major while I was in the Army. We were discussing how some of my friends at the time were engaged to be married and how young and stupid they were. It was at this time the Major pulled up a picture of Christie Brinkley and he said: “You see that, Billy Joel got tired of fucking that!”

Fact the Fourth: For every extremely hot chick out there, there is some guy that is tired of fucking her and putting up with her shit to do it.

He then went on to explain that it was best to date and mess around until at least 32 when you realize that all women are crazy and you have decided just how much crazy you’re willing to handle, then go out and find you some nice young side piece to marry.

Now getting back to the topic of Seth Rogen let's look at this clip from Entourage:

Fact the Fifth: Entourage is a great show

As much as I hate to admit it, Turtle does have a point. The odds of the scenario that occurred in Knocked Up happening to Average Joe Stoner in real life are pretty poor. That is unless Average Joe Stoner has the confidence to at least talk and introduce himself to an attractive woman, which brings me back to my point of practicing on less attractive people.

Confidence is one of those things that no matter what sex you are everyone seems to look for in a mate so it never hurts to take the time to practice. So the next time you see someone all alone huddle in the corner go up and talk to them, make their night and I’m sure eventually someone will help to make yours.

Please feel free to leave comments, I will respond to them and make sure to join me next time when I discuss the following scenario that may haunt you “I broke up with my Ex and now they’re dating a douche bag.”